Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz Has Left The Room

Originally published June 4, 2014.

Revised and republished January 11, 2016 after a web host transfer.

Below are two reasons I do not donate money when I receive Democratic fundraising emails, even though I am a registered Democrat.

Reason #1

“The Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee Has Left The Room”

Reason #2

Florida’s Democratic Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz sent me a fundraising email saying:

“President Obama sent you an email.

Vice President Biden sent you an email.

Nancy Pelosi sent you an email.

Now I’m sending you an email.

We’re emailing you because this is really important.”

Wasserman Schultz provided no email address for me to respond to her. When I went to her website to send an email, I received this message:

Zip Code Authentication Failed

I called Congresswoman Wasserman Schultz’s Florida office and asked if she or her staff would read a letter from Wisconsin. The staff member who answered the phone told me there was no guarantee because they had to look at mail from Florida first. If Wasserman Schultz is not going to give me a way to respond to her, then she has no business emailing me about anything. I told the staff member I would publish my response to Wasserman Schultz in a blog post with the hope that someone else would read it and say something to her.

Wasserman Schultz insulted me by deciding I was too “intellectually unsophisticated to know what is “really important” without her explaining it to me.

Wasserman Schultz created inequality for me by expecting me to remain silent and passive.

I do not trust politicians who ask for money so they can satisfy their power addiction, as indicated in the emails the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (DCCC) sends out. Debbie Wasserman Schultz has left the room along with all of those other Democrats.

I see little difference between Republican politicians seeking power for the sake of power and Democratic politicians seeking power for the sake of power. My needs fall outside the focus of power-seeking politicians from both  sides.

It is “really important” that politicians pay attention to my needs. Debbie Wasserman Schultz ignored my needs, treated me as if I were her intellectual inferior, and created inequality for me. Wasserman Schultz expected me to accept this insulting treatment without question and send money.

I refuse to donate money to politicians who will use my money to buy ads that say things I do not want said. I need Democrats and Republicans to speak respectfully about and to each other, to identify commonalities, and to identify ways to work around differences. I need Democrats to respect my needs, to respect my intelligence, and to create equality for me before they ask me for money.

Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz did none of what I need. She is yet another female politician who treats female constituents as unequal.

Time has proved that other Democratic voters feel that Wasserman Schultz has left the room.

“The Arrogance of Feminist Leaders”

“Demand Debbie Wasserman Schultz’s immediate resignation as DNC chair”
Spirituality for Justice
change.org

“It’s Time for Female Politicians to Treat Female Constituents
as Equals”

“What Do Feminist Leaders Have In Common with Outlaw Bikers,
Hierarchical Leaders, Donald Rumsfeld, and the Old Guard of the
Catholic Church?”

Paula M. Kramer
Resource Rock Star (See websites below.)

Copyright 2015
All rights reserved.

Posts on this blog alternate with posts at the link below. Posts for both blogs are published on Wednesdays as they are ready to be published. Time between posts could be weeks.

blog.smilessparksuccess.com

Resource Rock Star Details

speakingfromtriumph.com

smilessparksuccess.com

It’s Time For Female Politicians To Treat Female Constituents As Equals

Originally published March 26, 2014.

Revised and republished January 10, 2016 after a web host transfer.

Background On Inequality Between Women

Inequality between females is more common than equality between females. Females create inequality for other females through words and actions of betrayal.

In 1988, I watched Oprah Winfrey betray a female guest on her talk show. I couldn’t understand how Oprah could betray another woman. By that time, I already felt regret for the way I had treated a number of girls and women in my life, but I had never asked myself how I could betray another girl or woman. To figure out why Oprah betrayed her female guest, I wrote my masters thesis about women as television talk show hosts. What I learned from writing that thesis is that every girl in this country grows up learning how to betray other girls. As women we just keep doing what we grew up doing, betraying other women. Betrayal between females creates inequality between females.

I watched every talk show hosted by a woman for about five years (starting before I earned my B.A.). Most of the topics discussed on the shows fell into four repeating themes. I now call those themes the cultural themes of betrayal between women:

Women as mothers

Women and their appearance

Women as deviants

Teenage girls as threats to society

For more details about each of these themes, see Girl Grit.

As young girls, we learn to judge other girls according to these cultural themes of betrayal. As women, we continue to judge each other according to these cultural themes of betrayal. Even girls who grow up to become politicians judge and betray other women because that is what they learned to do.

Every time a female betrays another female, she betrays herself as well. Every time a female holds another female back, she holds herself back as well. Every time a female judges another woman according to the cultural themes of betrayal, she invites other females as well as males to judge her by the same cultural themes. It’s time for female politicians to learn to stop judging and betraying other females so they can begin to create equality for both constituent females and themselves.

Once I understood that I judged other females based on these cultural themes of betrayal, I rethought all of my relationships with girls and women. I wanted to find a way for all girls and women to stop betraying each other and start supporting each other. I found the way when I read Dr. Reg Williams’ four steps for new recruits to be more successful in the Navy. I adapted his steps, then added other steps as I realized their significance for females. Together they are the 12 Girl Goodwill Steps to Success & Equality:

1.  Look other girls and women in the eye and say hello. *

2.  Focus on what you have in common with other girls and women. *

3.  Create connections between girls and women to help them
recognize what they have in common.

4.  Ask questions to understand differences when you must
consider them.

5.  Avoid judging other girls and women *

6.  Avoid making assumptions by asking questions to
understand intentions.

7.  Listen to any other side of the story.

8.  Ask other girls and women for help, but avoid expecting
more than they can give. *

9.  Speak words to give other girls and women confidence.

10. Take action to help other girls and women shine.

11. Make room for other girls and women to share in success.

12. Speak what you want to hear because boys and men will
deny equality to girls and women as long as girls and women
deny equality to each other.

*  Adapted from Dr. Reg Williams
Former Professor of Psychiatry and Vietnam veteran

I read Dr. Williams’ advice for Navy recruits in a Good Housekeeping magazine early in the second Iraq war. The article is buried in a box somewhere in my house. I will post the citation when I find the article.

In an effort to spread the word about girl goodwill, I set up a Facebook campaign where girls and women could tell stories about helping other girls and women succeed. I told a few stories from my own life. Thankfully, I had a number of stories to tell, easing my guilt over the far greater number of times I betrayed other females.

One story is about a woman I had been in a class with during college. She became a television reporter. I emailed her to ask if I could use her name in a girl goodwill story about how I purposefully paid her a compliment early in her career to help her feel more confident. She said yes, but  wanted to have a phone conversation before I wrote the story. Before we could have that conversation, the television station let her go, probably because the station managers decided she had gotten too old and/or earned more money than they wanted to pay. I wrote the story without using her name. The former television reporter accepted what I wrote and published on the Girl Goodwill page without requesting any changes.

Note

Unfortunately, Facebook changed my administrative email address attached my original email address to a different page. I do not know the new email address, so I can  no longer administer that page. Facebook has ignored all my requests to give back my ability to administer my Girl Goodwill campaign.

Background On One Female Politician

I had briefly worked with a woman before she decided to go into politics. We talked about the ingredients for spectacular success and she found them useful. After her successful first election, I sent her an email, reminding her of the ingredients for spectacular success. She said she would remember them. Months later I sent her information about dream team formulas and pointed out which formula would be most appropriate for her to use as a politician. This was her response:

“Thank you so much for your kind words and very helpful thoughts on how I can work effectively for the district. I truly appreciate your words of wisdom and can’t wait to get to work!”

After I launched my Girl Goodwill campaign, I emailed the politician, explaining my campaign and asking if I could use her name in a story about giving her information to help her succeed. This is the response I received from her female assistant:

“Unfortunately, Wisconsin State Assembly ethics rules prohibit the use of any legislator’s name for marketing purposes.”

Marketing: the action or business of promoting and selling products or services, including market research and advertising.

I emailed the assistant back, requesting an explanation of how asking women to tell stories about helping other women succeed and telling my own stories about helping other women succeed was marketing. I received no response.

I felt the female assistant had misrepresented me to the politician. If the female assistant was capable of misrepresenting me, the female assistant was capable of misrepresenting other constituents. The politician could lose votes in future elections. I sent an explanatory letter to another female politician. I never received a response. When I ran into the first politician at a public event, she exuded anger at me.

How did this politician go from appreciating my words of wisdom to deciding I was making an unethical request? The cultural themes of betrayal got in the way.

Note: It might be common for women in positions of authority to see unethical intentions in other women to justify judging them as deviant. See Girl Growl Backfire: An Editor gives Herself an Unprofessional Image.

If you are female, you know a female politician is judging you by the cultural themes of betrayal when she makes a decision about you without asking questions to understand differences, without asking questions to understand intentions, without listening to every side of the story. Two female politicians and at least one female assistant judged me without asking any of those questions. All of these women judged me according to the cultural themes of betrayal. If those three women judged me according to the cultural themes of betrayal, they are capable of judging any other female constituent according to the cultural themes of betrayal.

When women judge other women according to the cultural themes of betrayal, they treat them as unequal. When female politicians judge constituent women according to the cultural themes of betrayal, they treat the women they are supposed to be representing as unequal. What sort of equal representation can constituent women expect from female politicians who use stereotypes to judge them as deviant?

If a female politician judges you as deviant, the questions below will help you let the politician know that you expect her to treat you as her equal. They are my questions to the politician who gratefully accepted the information I provided to help her succeed.  I expect her to treat me as her equal.

The questions are based on the six basic questions to ask politicians. Adapt the questions to your situation. You may not need to use all six of the basic questions.

My Questions

What criteria did you use to determine that stories about women helping other women succeed is marketing for profit?

How did you determine the accuracy of your criteria before you used them to judge me?

Why didn’t you ask for more information about the Girl Goodwill campaign?

Why didn’t you visit the Girl Goodwill Facebook page to see what kinds of stories women tell about helping other women succeed?

Why didn’t you ask to read the story I wanted to write about you?

These are the subjects of the current stories on the Girl Goodwill Facebook page:

Speaking four words to a little girl in a laundromat

Introducing upper class women to lower class women in
a way that gets them talking to each other

Letting a businesswoman know that breakfast meetings
attract more potential clients than dinner meetings

An offer of help after sudden bereavement

Preventing young workers from taking credit for an older
female worker’s insights

Giving a television reporter a boost of confidence

Turning an unemployed woman’s life around by answering
her question honestly

Refusing to continue the cultural themes of betrayal by
using girl goodwill with a woman who intentionally betrayed
me

Giving a woman information to help her succeed in her
new career

Now that you know what the stories are, what product or service does each story market?

What is unethical about my wanting to use your name in a story about giving you information to succeed when the information I gave you is free on my website, with free instructions for how to use it, with more free information about the importance of situational ingredients in creating success?

What am I marketing with free PDF downloads that say nothing about any product or service I offer?

Where will I get equal representation as a voter now that you have judged me as deviant?

How often do you judge female constituents as deviant?

Female Politicians Are Equal Only When Their Constituents Are Equal

When social status changes — including when someone wins their first political election — the new politician’s brain can change. Their social status and wealth grow compared to most of the people they associated with before their election. Their new status and increasing wealth can change their brains. Empathy for the people they saw as equals before the election will disappear if they no longer see those people as equals. Neither female politician felt empathy for my efforts to improve relationships between women. That is evidence that their brains have changed. They do not understand that my equality ensures their equality.

In spite of the judgmental response from the female politician, I told the story on the Girl Goodwill Facebook page anyway. I took out all identifying details. I initiated the action in the story so it is my story to tell. I do not market anything on the Girl Goodwill Facebook page or in my story about giving information to the politician. I told the story because I want girls and women to learn multiple ways of helping other girls and women succeed. Giving step by step information plus real world examples is one way to help other girls and women succeed.

I want the female politician I briefly worked with to succeed. All women should admire her for deciding to make a difference and succeeding on a difficult path. Just as success for any woman makes eventual success for all women more likely, equality for any woman makes eventual equality for all women more likely. The success of the politician makes my success more likely. Her equality in politics makes my equality as a citizen more likely. What all three of the women who judged me fail to understand is that success and equality for me makes success and equality for them more likely. It’s time for all female politicians to create equality for all female constituents, because equality between men and women will follow equality between women.

My Girl Goodwill Advice To Female Politicians With An Invitation For Male Politicians To Pay Attention

All politicians need to be aware of the potential loss of empathy for their constituents. All politicians need to take steps to keep their empathy intact. Follow these steps before making decisions about your constituents, both male and female:

Talk to people before you make decisions about them.

Ask questions to make sure you understand circumstances and intentions.

Investigate other opportunities to gather information about people and/or issues.

Constituents have the power to hire you, which means they also have the power to fire you. Staying hired means making decisions that give your constituents reasons to keep voting for you.

Do you, blog reader, see any marketing in that girl goodwill advice to help female politicians succeed?

“As for Empathy, the Haves Have Not”
Pamela Paul
The New York Times
December 30, 2010

“How Wealth Reduces Compassion”
Scientific American
Daisy Grewal
April 10, 2012

Paula M. Kramer
Resource Rock Star (See websites below.)

Copyright 2015
All rights reserved.

Posts on this blog alternate with posts at the link below. Posts for both blogs are published on Wednesdays as they are ready to be published. Time between posts could be weeks.

blog.smilessparksuccess.com

Standards For Success Posters

Girl Grit

Girl Goodwill

Resource Rock Star Details

speakingfromtriumph.com

smilessparksuccess.com

Creating Diversity Among Senior Management Women

Originally published May 23, 2013.

Updated and republished September 15, 2015.

Think about this observation from a male PhD in a LinkedIn discussion about women in senior management:

“…the most successful women leaders emerging these days
tend to be politically conservative…”

Conservative women are probably moving into senior management positions because conservative organizations encourage women to speak their own words and take their own actions in their daily lives. Conservative women gain experience, confidence, and a track record of success they can bring with them to senior management positions. For instance, during the 2012 presidential campaign, the conservative group Smart Girl Politics did all of the following:

Offered free online activist training, candidate training, and media interviewing training for any member

Trained thousands of women and men online and offline

Encouraged members to host house parties to introduce their friends to Smart Girl Politics Action (no longer in existence)

Celebrated women who “stepped up to the plate to make a difference in their community and in their state”

Celebrated women who became candidates for political office

Asked for women in almost 20 states “to step up as local and district leaders”

Asked for women to become “district leaders, volunteers, activists, researchers, and more” or to just say how they would like to get involved

Educated and mobilized women “across the country to help them voice their concerns in their communities…”

Smart Girl Politics Action also had a college smart girls page. SGPA leaders sought “self-starter” college women for internships that would give them “experience in community relations, marketing, new media and many other aspects of a nonprofit organization.” Interns would have “opportunities to work and interact with women from a variety of backgrounds across the country.” The internships would give them “experience to add to their resume before they begin a job search.”

Interns should have:

communication skills

management skills

Interns would be able to:

work independently

take initiative

Intern projects included:

event planning

fundraising

political and legislative research

drafting articles for the SPGA website

other projects

Feminist organizations like the National Organization for Women, on the other hand, do none of the above. Feminist leaders expect supporters to remain silent and passive. Feminist leaders reserve speaking and taking action for themselves. They train only national and state chapter leaders and people NOW leaders choose to be activists. (I suspect that NOW leaders carefully choose activists who will faithfully follow orders.)  Feminist leaders expect supporters to donate money so NOW staff and the chosen few can travel around the country for training and socializing.

Leaders at the National Organization for Women do not even allow NOW staffers who are younger and/or women of color to attend important meetings (as told by Jessica Valenti to More Magazine, November 2010). The January 14, 2013 issue of Time Magazine includes an article about abortion. Reporter Kate Pickert wrote that the older feminists are “reluctant to pass the torch” to younger feminists, creating a “power struggle”.

SPGA leaders pass power to young women while NOW leaders hoard power for themselves. The conservative young women who learn to hold and use power become the women who have the experience, confidence, and track record of success necessary to move into senior management positions.

Whether you want abortion legal or illegal is not my concern. My concern is moving progressive women into senior management positions to create another kind of diversity. Just as gender diversity, racial diversity, and ethnic diversity are important for senior management to be effective, political diversity is also important. But according to that observant male PhD on LinkedIn, we do not have political diversity among women in senior management. The better we are at collaborating with a variety of perspectives as coworkers, the more effective we will be at collaborating with a variety of perspectives as citizens.

This kind of collaboration has already produced life improvements for millions of women. Republican Senator Olympia Snowe and Democratic Senator Pat Schroeder were co-chairs on the Congressional Caucus for Women’s Issues. They disagreed on abortion, but set that issue aside and worked on other issues. Their collaboration produced legislative funds to research and treat diseases affecting women. Support from the caucus “became a kind of Good Housekeeping seal of approval for legislation…” All women in the United States have benefited from the Good Housekeeping seal of approval created by two women who collaborated despite different political views.

We don’t have to wait for feminist leaders to start helping ordinary women move into senior management positions. An example of how anyone can encourage women to speak their own words and take their own actions so that they develop experience, confidence, and track records of success comes from Patty Dreier, County Executive in Portage County, Wisconsin. Portage County is a hotbed of spectacular success. The longest running and most successful renewable energy fair in the world takes place in Portage County, as does the world’s largest Trivia contest. It is also the birthplace of Becoming an Outdoors-Woman, which now holds workshops around the world. Other spectacular successes exist there.

Patty Dreier is lucky because she is surrounded by people who use their passions, talents, and ideas to create spectacular success. Dreier is smart because she makes connections between people with similar passions, talents, and ideas. When Patty Dreier connects people, she creates success opportunities. The people Dreier connects have the opportunity to collaborate and create various successes.

When Patty Dreier connects women with similar passions, talents, and ideas, she creates opportunities for women to develop the experience, confidence, and track record they need to be ready to take advantage of other success opportunities, including senior management positions. Patty Dreier is helping ordinary women move up in the world while the National Organization for Women is holding ordinary women down. You can read more about Patty Dreier in my blog post on “3 Styles of Best & Brightest Leadership”.

If you are already doing what Senator Olympia Snowe, Senator Pat Schroeder, and County Executive Patty Dreier do, please contact me so I can consider writing about you. If not, please start following their examples for increasing collaboration between ordinary women, between ordinary women and senior management women, and between senior management women. Snowe, Schroeder, and Dreier all demonstrate Girl Goodwill, at least at times. If every woman acted with Girl Goodwill, all women would benefit.

To encourage leaders at the National Organization for Women (NOW) to create success opportunities for women, contact them with these two questions:

1.  Why does NOW deny its ordinary members equal access to
the training they pay for and equal opportunity to take action?

2.  Why does NOW deny young feminists and feminists of color
equal access to important meetings and equal opportunity to
express their opinions?

For background information on the questions for NOW and more about conservative organizations, read these four posts:

If Feminist Leaders Want Equality, Why Do They Create Inequality?

A Dedicated Network of Glory Addicts

Maybe You Can Get An Answer…

Why Do Feminist Leaders Think You Can’t Remember Where You Are on the Internet?

Keep checking the “Feminist Leaders” category for more blog posts exposing how feminist leaders create inequality between women.

“What Choice?”
Kate Pickert
Time Magazine
January 14, 2013

“What the New Feminists Look Like”
News & Politics Editors
More Magazine
November 2010

Pat Schroeder: A Woman of the House
Joan A. Lowy
University of New Mexico Press, 2003, quote from page 8

Paula M. Kramer
Resource Rock Star (See websites below.)
Copyright 2015
All rights reserved.

Posts on this blog alternate with posts at the link below. Posts for both blogs are published on Wednesdays as they are ready to be published. Time between posts could be weeks.

blog.smilessparksuccess.com

Standards For Success Posters

Girl Grit

Girl Goodwill

Resource Rock Star Details

speakingfromtriumph.com

smilessparksuccess.com

For a wide ranging selection of articles on feminism and other topics,
see The Zawadi Nyong’o Daily

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As an American, I have freedom of speech.

As a woman, I have the right to express my opinion about anything the National Organization for Women claims to do for women.

In 2016, I started adding the section below to all of my new Feminist Leader blog posts. I also added it to all posts published before 2016.

The National Organization For Women
Silences Women

National NOW has blocked me on its Facebook page. I wrote comments based on my blog posts. All of my blog posts are based on a wide variety of evidence. Much of the evidence comes from National NOW’s website, emails and posts from NOW presidents, and emails from NOW staff members. I use no hostile language, no slurs, no profanity. I do use the phrase “glory addicts” in reference to NOW leaders. I also use “glory addiction”, “glory fixes”, and “a dedicated network of glory addicts”. Dr. Marsha Vanderford (Doyle) identified the glory needs of pro-choice leaders in her 1982 dissertation.

Feminist leaders have been silencing women for decades. bell hooks, Gloria Steinem, Urvashi Vaid, and Naomi Wolf got together for a conversation that was published in Ms. Magazine in 1993. The discussion included why women choose not ta call themselves feminists. Did these four feminist leaders working for women’s equality ask women who choose not to call themselves feminist to speak for themselves? Of course not! The four feminist leaders silenced millions of women by speaking for them without first requesting permission to speak for them.

Imagine a group of women who choose not to call themselves feminists getting together for a conversation to be published in a magazine about why some women call themselves feminists. Would hooks, Steinem, Vaid, Wolf, or Ms. Magazine agree with nonfeminist women denying them the opportunity to speak for themselves? Of course not! Would hooks, Steinem, Vaid, Wolf, or Ms. Magazine agree that nonfeminist women had the right to speak for feminist women without their permission? Of course not!

My feminist leader blog posts provide evidence that feminist leaders still create glory for themselves while relegating supporters to “secondary importance”. Dr. Vanderford used the words “relegated” and “secondary importance” in her dissertation. Eoin Harnett of University College Cork in Ireland used the same “secondary importance” phrase:

“Throughout the ages, women were frequently characterised
and treated as inferior and of secondary importance to men.”

NOW leaders even relegated two of their supporters to secondary importance. The supporters responded to my last two comments on National NOW’s Facebook page with comments supporting NOW. NOW leaders silenced those supporters by removing their comments along with my comments. Instead of creating equality, NOW leaders treat other women the same way patriarchal men treat women:

NOW leaders silenced at least three women on Facebook while posting claims to be creating equality for women. Secondary importance is the opposite of equality, as women throughout the ages could testify.

In-House Rhetoric of Pro-Life and Pro-Choice Special Interest Groups in Minnesota: Motivation and Alienation
Dissertation, University of Minnesota, 1982
Marsha Vanderford Doyle, Ph.D.
(Now Marsha Vanderford)
Quoted words on page 350.

“Let’s Get Real about Feminism: The Backlash, the Myths, the Movement.”
hooks, bell, Gloria Steinem, Urvashi Vaid, and Naomi Wolf.
Ms. Magazine.
Vol 4(2) September/October 1993: pages 34-43.

“Multitext Project in Irish History: Movements for Political & Social Reform, 1870-1914”
Eoin Hartnett
University College Cork, Ireland
No date
This project is no longer available online.

Updated April 30, 2017.